Don Corleone “Greatly Displeased” With FBI Seizure Of Cohen Files

Don Corleone “Greatly Displeased” With FBI Seizure Of Cohen Files

 
LITTLE ITALY, NY –

Saying he was “most unhappy” with developments in the recent Russiagate investigation, and that “a man’s privacy must be respected always,” Don Vito Corleone expressed disappointment Tuesday over the seizure of attorney Michael Cohen’s records by the NY office of the FBI.

Mr. Corleone, a Sicilian-born immigrant and head of the alleged crime-syndicate Corleone family, believes the government over-stepped its bounds.

“When I arrived in this country, the communications between a client and his attorney were considered a sacred thing,” he told Make America The Best. “But now, the FBI comes into a man’s office and take all of his records without permission. It’s very disturbing.”

 

Respect For The Social Order

“A society needs laws,” said Don Corleone from the darkened parlor of his Long Island residence as his family celebrated the engagement of a nephew in the back yard. “A man must respect the moral code at all times. If not for these things, we would be just like animals.”

“It pains my heart to see a respectable man treated in this way by people who should be upholding the law. It is not right.”

 

A Family’s Honor

Mr. Cohen, who has compared himself in private to a mafia consigliere, reportedly made payments to a porn star and playboy model to keep them quiet about their affairs with President Trump.

“Of course, if this man has behaved in a disreputable fashion, and brought dishonor to his family, then action must be taken,” said the Don. “I would never stand in the way of justice being done when a family’s honor is at stake.”

Asked if he would consider making anyone involved in the investigation an offer they could not refuse, Don Corleone said he would never rush in to an unwise course of action.

However, representatives of the Corleone family have reportedly made inquiries at Belmont Park regarding several persons involved in the proceedings: in particular, whether anyone involved keeps a horse at the local stables, and at what time they generally turn in to bed to go to sleep.

 
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