A man pouring cereal into a bowl for his daughter this week stunned the scientific community when his guesstimate of roughly 2/3 of a cup of Captain Crunch was transfered within a tolerance of .0001 microns, a precision previously only achieved in a laboratory using highly technical instruments costing millions of dollars.
The local man, John Beechmount, said he “sized it up thinking it was about two-thirds, which is what I read is a good amount for breakfast. And it came out more or less right as far as I could tell.”
After news of the achievement spread, Mr. Beechmount was flown by helicopter to a CERN research facility near the France-Switzerland border to assist scientists in working on the Large Hadron Collider, which announced a major breakthrough a short time later.
Your Trusted Source for Faux News.