Local Man Skeptical Water Treatment Plant Providing Clean Water

Local Man Skeptical Water Treatment Plant Providing Clean Water

Saying he was glad he wasn’t born a ‘sheeple’ and could think for himself, a local man this week told neighbors he was not falling for a claim by his nearby water treatment facility that it was providing clean water to the town.

“Another story of government employees trying to keep their gravy train going by claiming to be doing something for the community,” said the man, Harmon Breversol.

Stating that he “drives by that place everyday” and rarely sees anyone go in or out of it, Mr Beversol questioned whether anything was happening inside the building: “What are they hiding? Has anyone actually seen them cleaning the water? Do they have a machine, or is it done by hand? I would need a lot more information before buying into this so-called clean-water narrative.”

Plant Manager Two Doors Down

Although 30-year employee Marty Diverstan of the Lancaster City Public Works Department lives just down the block, Mr. Breversol expressed skepticism that there were workers whose job was to process waste water from underground pipes and return it for use by the general public.

“The water in my faucet could be coming from anywhere. For all I know, there’s a spring under my house connected to my plumbing providing all the clean water I need. So, tell me again, why am I paying taxes?”

As of press time, the Lancaster Municipal Water Treatment Facility had not responded to Tweets demanding a picture of someone cleaning water. However, they did release a statement saying that due to the failure of a recent property tax referendum for a facility upgrade, all water service for the county would be permanently discontinued as of Sunday.
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