AltUSNatlParkService Twitter Feed Joined By AltUSNatlGovernment

AltUSNatlParkService Twitter Feed Joined By AltUSNatlGovernment

  WASHINGTON, DC – An attempt by some US National Park Employees to draw attention to the growing concerns of climate change, and resist censorship by the new Trump Administration on science issues, was joined recently by a much larger group when 15 million US Federal Employees opened the AltUSNatlGovernment Twitter account. Millions of federal […]

Admin Password Lost for Wikipedia Home Page, Site Is On Its Own Now

Admin Password Lost for Wikipedia Home Page, Site Is On Its Own Now

SAN FRANCISCO, CA – A series of coincidences during server upgrades for the Wikipedia.org website resulted in an unfortunate outcome Tuesday when all seven admin password were accidentally disabled, making it impossible for anyone to administer the world’s largest online encyclopedia. “Yeah, it was one of those late night mistakes” said Ratavan Gumli, the project […]

Washington Monument is Hangry

Washington Monument is Hangry

WASHINGTON, DC – Thursday night, several tourists in Washington, DC were present for what amounted to a rare break in decorum from the nation’s greatest monument to our first president.  According to the park officials in charge of the national mall, around 8pm the monument started to become what witnesses described as very hangry. Visitors […]

Trump Reveals Secret Plan To Defeat ISIS is Steve Harvey

Trump Reveals Secret Plan To Defeat ISIS is Steve Harvey

WASHINGTON DC – Under intense pressure from his military advisers who want to step up the campaign against ISIS, President Trump today revealed that his secret plan to defeat the terrorist organization is the well-known comedian and Family Feud host Steve Harvey. According to sources inside the Joint Chiefs of Staff, top generals pressed Mr. […]

Rapper Viper Tapped to Head Up Library Of Congress

Rapper Viper Tapped to Head Up Library Of Congress

HOUSTON, TX – In a dramatic move showing “outside the box” thinking by the Trump administration, prolific rapper, entrepreneur, and real estate agent Viper has been named to head up the US Library of Congress according to sources in Washington. Viper, the Houston-based, self-produced rapper has a track record of prodigious output unmatched over the […]

Trump Lashes Out At John Lewis Department Store, Calls Store Crummy

Trump Lashes Out At John Lewis Department Store, Calls Store Crummy

WASHINGTON, DC – After a stinging comment from Congressman John Lewis on NBC’s Meet the Press, in which Mr. Lewis said he did not believe President-Elect Trump was legitimately elected due to Russian interference, Trump took to Twitter this morning and lashed out at beloved UK department store John Lewis. The department store, which opened […]

Ben Carson Not Thinking About Announcing New HUD Pyramid Grain Silos

Ben Carson Not Thinking About Announcing New HUD Pyramid Grain Silos

WASHINGTON DC – The Department of Housing and Urban Development announced Wednesday that Secretary Ben Carson is not mulling over using a portion of the Housing and Urban Development budget to construct grain silos in the form of giant stone pyramids on the edge of the nation’s capital. “No, he is not thinking about that […]

White House To Let Putin Come Over, But Trump Will Select Movie

White House To Let Putin Come Over, But Trump Will Select Movie

  WASHINGTON, DC – In a carefully negotiated deal hammered out in the wake of a successful meeting with the Russian President in Helsinki, the White House today announced that while it is OK for Russian President Vladimir Putin to come over, President Trump will most definitely get to pick the movie. The movie night […]

Animal Gun Ownership Up 40 Percent Following Las Vegas Shooting

Animal Gun Ownership Up 40 Percent Following Las Vegas Shooting

  UNITED STATES, EARTH – Fearing for their safety in the wake of the Las Vegas shootings, and amid concerns that their second amendment rights are under attack, animal gun ownership is up sharply in the US across large sections of the country, in some places as high as 50% over previous years. Mert Bolieau, […]