Doorknob Declares It Will Run for President in 2020

Doorknob Declares It Will Run for President in 2020

COUNCIL BLUFFS, IA – Anticipating a wide open race in the coming years, a doorknob in Council Bluffs, Iowa, has become the first candidate out of the gate to declare its candidacy for the 2020 United States presidential election. The doorknob, a Craftsman-style knob mounted on a bronze escutcheon, does not identify with a particular […]

Polar Bears Being Wiped Out As Part of Intelligent Design, Insists Local Kansas School Board

Polar Bears Being Wiped Out As Part of Intelligent Design, Insists Local Kansas School Board

BROWNSVILLE, KS – In response to increased attention being paid in classrooms to the plight of polar bears in a shrinking habitat, the School Board of Brownsville Township recently advised teachers to provide not only scientific reasons for the animals’ situation, but to also spend time presenting the theory that polar bears are being wiped […]

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