SANTA MONICA, CA – Passersby on a Santa Monica street were treated to an unexpected sight in the early morning hours Tuesday when they came upon a man in an alleyway that reportedly looked a lot like Kanye West shooting lightning bolts from his fingers. At approximately 1AM, local resident Saam Ibril had just left […]
ANTARCTICA – Climate scientists at the Far South Polar Expeditionary Station were just getting started with their seasonal ice core drilling this week, when they accidentally became party to a life-and-death struggle with an infamous and fearsome creature. The research team was 100 miles inland from the Ross Ice Shelf on a scientific mission to […]
PRINCETON, NJ – In a response to the clamoring of Americans for a better theory of relativity, a group of billionaires has released a new theory to replace that of famous physicist and mathematician Albert Einstein. The billionaires collaborating on the new theory, a diverse group that reportedly included Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, and Mark […]
EARTH, OUR SOLAR SYSTEM – An historic event that has been both anticipated and feared by the earth’s inhabitants throughout time occurred on Friday when a very clear message was received by the instruments at SETI, the worldwide research organization dedicated to detecting radio frequency transmissions from outer space. “We have been looking for patterns […]
EARTH, OUR SOLAR SYSTEM – The world collectively injured its jaw Tuesday as it reacted to the appearance of yet another satirical news site on the internet. Orthopedic surgeon Dr. Martin Barrows of New York’s UCC Congregationalists Hospital, who treated the world, said that it occurred while the world was having coffee and saw an […]
MARS, OUR SOLAR SYSTEM – Sleemonsters living in a crater that was named after president-elect Donald Trump in 1992 have decided this week to remove the Trump name from their Martian home. The crater is located near the massive volcano Olympus Mons in the Mars northern hemisphere. The crater’s original scientific designation, MO-13189, was […]
This Day in Science: This day in 1924, the culmination of years of effort came to fruition when researchers at the Krumrye Laboratories in Scotland discovered a scent that caused people in large crowds who breathed in the odor to immediately begin urinating uncontrollably until their bladders were completely emptied. The scientific team, which conducted […]