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Saturday, November 2, 2024

NFL Changing Nomenclature for Concussions to Procussions

NEW YORK, NY  –

The National Football League today announced that the league will no longer list players who have suffered head injuries on the weekly injury report as having “concussions”, but will list players under the new league term “procussions” instead.

After numerous studies linking repeated blows to the head, known in the medical community as concussions, to the development of possible long-lasting injuries to the brain such as Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy, the National Football League has long sought to come up with a more positive term for an injury that has developed such negative connotations in the main stream media.

Football analyst Grom Reedley, who has studied the growing concern of players and public over the long term health effects, said this was a smart move by the league to try and turn the tide of public opinion. “Really from a public relations perspective, the league has been hamstrung by this terminology from the beginning. The first syllable in the word “concussions” is “con” which by definition means “negative” or “undesirable”. It’s very unfair to the league when doctors and health professionals get to criticize them using the word “con-cussions” over and over again. It leaves a bad taste in people’s mouths.”

Although it’s unclear if the new terminology will be embraced by the health care community at large, some see an upside to putting a more positive spin on things. “It is true that a positive outlook can help a person along in the healing process,” said Registered Nurse Rita Durnwiler of New Shephards Medical Center in Lower Manhattan. “If a doctor tells a patient that they have a concussion, typically that patient will be very concerned about what that might entail health-wise But if that same doctors tells them they have a procussion, they are generally not going to be as concerned, since they don’t know what that word means.”

Brent Plutarsky, who played center on numerous collegiate and professional teams and who was famous for his  habit of jumping onto his head to celebrate touchdowns called the “Plutarsky Plunge”, thinks the new moniker will be a big plus for the league. “I random blue at distance with tornado” he said. “It’s not flight simulator that everyday we harken do you hear what I hear.”

 

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