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Tuesday, December 3, 2024

Business

Red Lobster Announces New All-You-Buy Restaurant Equipment Auction

Following on the heels of their recent "all-you-can-eat" shrimp promotion, Red Lobster has announced an unprecedented "all-you-can-buy" restaurant equipment special, inviting customers to purchase...

Marketing Manager Unaware AI Spending $1 Million Per Minute Running Company’s Ad On Pinterest

Marketing Manager Kevin Milzigren of local skin care products company Skintastics, was blissfully unaware Friday as he aimlessly scrolled thru vacation options in Mexico...

College Student Relieved To Discover Social Security Will Almost Cover Student Loan Payments When She Retires

SANDUSKY, OH - In the bustling college town where she is working toward her bachelor’s degree in Psychology, local college student Sarah Miler was relieved...

FAA Assured By Boeing Missing Wing Was No Big Deal

  Saying a software fix was on the way, Boeing executives assured authorities at the Federal Aviation Administration last June that an early design of...

CEO Asks Board To Clarify How He Can Be Paid So Much Friggin’ Money

NEW YORK - In an effort to gather more information from his company's board of directors regarding his compensation, a CEO this week sent a...

Stock Market Soars On News Americans Will Now Work For Food

NEW YORK - In a surprising turn of events, the stock market on Tuesday experienced a surge following the announcement that a growing number of...

Airline Lobbyists Swarm Capitol, Demand Financial Legroom

  After all those free bags of peanuts, it's the least we can do.   makeamericathebest.com Your Trusted Source for Faux News

Job Creator At Vacation Home Assures Workers Safe To Return To Work During Pandemic

  We're all in this together. Just not in the same place.   makeamericathebest.com Your Trusted Source for Faux News.

Frantic Hedge Fund Owner Unable To Dump $2 Billion Short On Chuck E Cheese

  Which sub was that again?   makeamericathebest.com Your Trusted Source for Faux News.

President Trump Renames National Anthem ‘United States of America Song’

  WASHINGTON DC - On the heels of successfully re-titling the "North American Free Trade Agreement" as the "United States-Mexico-Canada Agreement," President Trump followed up by...

Trump Fires Pompeo For Disturbingly Low Net Worth

  WASHINGTON DC - A disturbed President Trump was forced to fire his Secretary of State this week when aids confessed that not only is the...

Gold Doubloons Purchased On Ebay Actually Just Euros In Leather Pouch

  PEORIA, IL - A local man with a side business of buying and selling items on Ebay made an unhappy discovery this week when...

Sesame Street Launches New Bertcoin Exchange

SESAME STREET, NY - With an eye toward introducing the concept of cryptocurrency to young viewers, and possibly creating a new global monetary vehicle for...

Dow Jones Industrial Average To Re-Brand As Dow Jones Elite

  WALL STREET - In an effort to better tailor its brand image to a more upscale clientele who have the resources to purchase its stocks,...

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