UNITED STATES, EARTH –
Fearing for their safety in the wake of the Las Vegas shootings, and amid concerns that their second amendment rights are under attack, animal gun ownership is up sharply in the US across large sections of the country, in some places as high as 50% over previous years.
Mert Bolieau, registered firearm instructor in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, was not surprised by the rise in animal gun ownership. “Animals are a lot smarter than we give them credit for,” said Mr. Bolieau. “They see the humans stockpiling more and more guns and shooting each other. And while they might not understand that the second amendment is under attack the way you or I would, they know something is up.”
Dogs and cats are among the animals with the highest increases in gun ownership, up 38% and 42% respectively. Opossums, muskrats, mules, and falcons have also seen marked increases between 20-30% over last year.
Gun shows have also seen greater participation from animals.
Once Was Just Occassional Cat Or Dog
Horton Melville, who has been selling guns at shows for 30 years, has witnessed the trend first hand. “Animals are not subject to the same background checks as people, since they are not covered by the law, so consequently, they can purchase firearms much more easily.”
“It used to be you’d see the odd cat or dog come in to purchase. Usually just a hand gun,” Mr. Melville said. “Nowadays they come in with thousands of dollars and just buy everything you have.”
“I’m all for the second amendment. But to be honest, it’s a little disconcerting,” he said.
Government Overreach
While Mr. Bolieau was glad for the extra business at the gun range, he’s not sure if more gun ownership by animals is a good thing for the country. “Many of the animals are law-abiding creatures that practice gun safety and come to the range to learn how to handle their weapons responsibly. But it seems like tens of thousands of the guns are just disappearing into the forest. I’m not sure why they need so many. I guess the forest must be getting more dangerous or something.”
“At any rate,” he added, “at least they can protect themselves from government overreach, which is what it’s all about, right?”
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