Bruce Springsteen Shuts Down US Government, Returns Land To Indians

Bruce Springsteen Shuts Down US Government, Returns Land To Indians

  Frustrated by his country’s inability to get on anything resembling a path to common decency despite decades of effort, singer-songwriter and national treasure Bruce Springsteen used a little known clause in the US Constitution Tuesday to dissolve the United States government, and return the land to its indigenous peoples. “Obviously this has all been […]

New Poll Shows Americans Still Confident Rich People Will Save Them

New Poll Shows Americans Still Confident Rich People Will Save Them

  A new survey released by the non-partisan pollster Statum Finis this week showed that despite the many serious challenges Americans will face in the coming decades, a majority of them are still confident that rich people will ultimately solve all the nation’s problems. “Yeah, it’s pretty daunting to think of all the terrible things […]


President Enacts 100% Tariffs On All Countries Everywhere

President Enacts 100% Tariffs On All Countries Everywhere

  Declaring you can never have too much of a good thing, President Trump today announced he will be enacting 100% tariffs on all goods and materials imported from any country, regardless of what the product is, what it’s used for, or where it came from. “For years, we have suffered from terrible trade deals […]

Visitor From Future Confirms: Trump Totally Blamed For Everything

Visitor From Future Confirms: Trump Totally  Blamed For Everything

  A space traveler from earth’s distant future, where human beings dwell in underground caves without sunlight, and subsist on bacteria grown in pools of sulphur, confirmed Tuesday that President Trump will indeed be blamed for all the ills that befall humanity from here on out. “Yep, he’s pretty much blamed for everything,” said the […]

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