Russian Probe Opened on LA Dodgers, May Have Influenced NLCS

Russian Probe Opened on LA Dodgers, May Have Influenced NLCS

  WASHINGTON DC – Reports that a KGB spy has been playing right field and pitching in relief for the Los Angeles Dodgers during the National League Championship Series dealt another heavy blow to officials already reeling in Washington this week. Sources say a full investigation has been launched to find out if, indeed, Sergei […]

Horse Tells Cowboy Who Likes Trump To Get The F*** Off

Horse Tells Cowboy Who Likes Trump To Get The F*** Off

GRIMLEY, WY – In a measure of how deeply divided the nation has become over the subject of politics, a horse and its rider became embroiled in conflict this week over the mere mention of the US President’s name. “I hadn’t realized how bad things had gotten until today,” said local rodeo clown Jumpin’ Jee-horse-aphat. […]

President Trump Proposes Hefner Memorial On National Mall

President Trump Proposes Hefner Memorial On National Mall

  WASHINGTON DC – Reportedly distraught over the recent death of publisher, impresario, and abortion rights advocate Hugh Hefner, President Trump has called on congress to establish a memorial on the National Mall in his memory. “Hugh Hefner was a great American who believed in all the things that make America great. And we owe […]

GOP Introduces New 402K Plans, So Americans Can Save For Routine Medical Care When They’re Broke

GOP Introduces New 402K Plans, So Americans Can Save For Routine Medical Care When They’re Broke

  WASHINGTON DC – In response to complaints from health insurance companies that too many Americans are going into bankruptcy, Republicans have introduced a new tax reform measure designed to help Americans save money for routine visits to the doctor should they become destitute as a result of a paying excessively high medical bills. The […]

President Trump Releases List Of Acceptable Human Body Positions

President Trump Releases List Of Acceptable Human Body Positions

  WASHINGTON, DC – In the wake of the confusion over the President’s approval and disapproval over kneeling, locking arms, and other body positions of NFL players this weekend, the Administration today released a guide to acceptable positions for the human body to be in. Addressing a wide range of poses including kneeling, crouching, standing […]

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