Spa Owners Scramble To Assure Clientele Facials Not Offensive

Spa Owners Scramble To Assure Clientele Facials Not Offensive

  Facing a steep decline in reservations for both full and half-day packages, and almost non-existent bookings for facials, alarmed spa owners across the country this week sought to reassure the public that there is nothing wrong with wearing white creams on your face. “We’ve been letting customers know that it’s just to moisturize the […]

Black Panther “Definitely A Decent Movie” According To White Friend Hoping To Change Subject

Black Panther “Definitely A Decent Movie” According To White Friend Hoping To Change Subject

  SANTA MONICA, CA – A white friend who went out of his way to assert ‘Black Panther’ was “totally worthy” of being seen by a wider audience, and “definitely deserved its high rating on Rotten Tomatoes”, was reportedly making a substantial effort to change the topic of conversation this week.   Impressive Costumes Although […]

Flintstones Sue David Hockney For $90.3 Million Dollars

Flintstones Sue David Hockney For $90.3 Million Dollars

  SANTA MONICA, CA – In a lawsuit filed this morning in federal district court, a factory worker has accused famed British artist David Hockney of plagiarism in the copying of a painting his wife made of him standing over a pool in his neighbor’s backyard. The plaintiff, Fred Flintstone, alleges that the famous artist […]

Sacha Baron Cohen Reveals New Angry Unfunny Balding Character

Sacha Baron Cohen Reveals New Angry Unfunny Balding Character

  WASHINGTON DC – In a follow-up to his recent hit series “Who Is America?”, the impresario Sasha Baron Cohen made an appearance this week as yet another outlandish TV character: this time as a heavy set, balding man trying to pick a fight. The new character, who goes by the alias “Alex Jones,” accosted […]


Man’s Idea For Saving Neccos So MF’ing Crazy, It Just Might Work

Man’s Idea For Saving Neccos So MF’ing Crazy, It Just Might Work

  BROOKLYN, NY – A Brooklyn man mulling over the closure of the factory that makes the famous “Neccos” candy, a favorite for generations of Americans, became convinced today he can save the wafer thin treat; however, to do it will require extraordinary measures never before used in the confectionery industry. “It’s pretty extreme,” said […]

Zach Galifianakis’ Doppelgänger To Play Hamlet In RSC Production

Zach Galifianakis’ Doppelgänger To Play Hamlet In RSC Production

  LONDON, UK – The culmination of 15 years of hard work to master the acting skills required to bring Shakespeare to life, paid off this week as the doppelgänger of American comedian Zach Galifianakis was awarded the title role in the new Royal Shakespeare Company’s production of Hamlet. The doppelgänger, 27-year-old Martin Wylie of […]

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