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Sunday, April 21, 2024

Dolphin At Local Aquarium Silently Judges Your Questionable Attire


A bottle-nosed dolphin that appeared to smile at you Saturday as you approached the 40,000 gallon tank that is its home, was actually silently judging your badly coordinated outfit sources say.

The dolphin, youngest of the seven dolphins who make up the colony at your local aquarium, found your choice of a blue and orange checked shirt and hunter green khakis clownish.

Your running shoes, which you wore because you thought they would be comfortable, looked provincial and off-putting to the dolphin. And your white tube socks only served to confirm his opinion that you are lacking in style and taste.


Looked Like He Was Smiling

Dolphins have a naturally curved jawline which gives humans the mistaken impression that they are smiling, when in fact, they may be upset or in distress.

But the dolphin that observed your apparel Saturday, as you struggled to take a picture of it with your mobile phone, was not in distress. It was simply bemused by your appearance, thinking: “Oh dear. Who let you out of the house young man?”


Sea Urchin Liked Your Outfit

However in the next tank, a Sea Urchin, which does not have a true brain but instead processes sensory input using a large nerve ring encircling its mouth, thought your outfit looked cool.

Mainly because you looked like glowing algae.


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