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Sunday, July 14, 2024

Local Pastor Struggles To Find Reassuring Theme


Despite the many good news stories that are happening in his congregation, and the lack of any significant problems in his life, or in the lives of people he knows, a local pastor was finding it hard on Tuesday to come up with an uplifting theme for this week’s sermon.

“I used to be able to crank these puppies out one after the other,” said Pastor Ron Bagley of the First Christian Bastion Church in Bradington, Oregon. “They practically wrote themselves when I was coming up thru divinity school. But now, I just can’t seem to find that twist any more. I wish I knew what the problem was.”


Kind Of Dumfounded

A veteran pastor of 14 years, Pastor Ron, as he is known to his congregation, has always managed to end his sermons on a high note, giving his listeners a positive message to take with them. But not this week.

“I’m doing all the things I normally do. Getting out into nature. Taking Ralph to the dog park. Stopping by the local care center to call on some of our older parishioners. But nothing seems to be working.”


Creeping Feeling

Although not one to pay too much attention to current events, Pastor Ron has noticed he is lingering on the news channels a lot longer than he used to before moving on to watch his favorite nature show.

“I used to quickly check CNN to see if there were any big events I should be aware of, but these days there are so many troublesome things going on that I have a hard time turning the channel. From the wild fires to the shootings to the accusations of racism and the political mudslinging – it’s a lot to process.”

“I suppose it doesn’t help to have the newspaper sitting by my computer all day,” he said. “One minute, I’ll be looking out the window thinking of the power of positivity, and the next I’m suddenly reading about a shouting match between two protesters at a benefit for an animal shelter that turned into a gun fight in front of a group of Japanese tourists on Segways.”


Just Needs To Keep Working

While he acknowledges that everyday life has become a little more stressful for the average person, Pastor Ron knows if he keeps working, he’ll able to find the silver lining for Sunday.

“Collections have been down at the church, and we’re noticing that the craft fair, bake sale, and flea market proceeds have been steadily declining over the past years. So, we’re not immune to what’s going on in the world. But life is full of joy and wonder. And I know that if I can stay focused on that, I’ll think of something,” he said.

“But I do have to say, it sure would be a hell of a lot easier if I didn’t have to work in all this bible crap.”

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