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Friday, April 26, 2024

Frustrated Curling Teammate Sends All Those Thingies With The Handles Down At Once

ST PAUL, MN –

After becoming upset today during a training session at a facility in Saint Paul, MN, a curling teammate hoping to gain a spot in the Winter Olympics slid every last one of those thingies all the way down the ice in a big pile up at the other end.

Teammates Had To Gather All The Thingies

The thingies, which completely filled up all the red and blue circles, caused a situation in which no more thingies could be slid down the ice. Frantic team members scrambled to quickly gather the thingies and send them back down to where they came from.

“These thingies have handles on them,” said the captain of the curling team, “so, it’s not too hard to pick them up. And they have a slippery part on the bottom that slides on the ice pretty good, so it wasn’t too bad to send them back to the starting spot. But it did take several minutes that we could have used to practice swishing our brooms.”

A worker at the facility witnessed the team member slide all the thingies down. “He was really, really frustrated,” said Herb Maseles, who is in charge of keeping the ice clean and smooth. “It’s understandable, since it’s hard to get those thingies to go where you want because of the slippery part. But you have to keep your cool.”

Broom Guys Need To Get Their Act Together

The person who slid all the thingies reportedly was not happy with his teammates who were swishing their brooms. “Sometimes, the broom guys just aren’t swishing their brooms right,” said the local curling club president, Ron Jargon. “So, the person sliding the thingies gets a little frustrated, because the thingies don’t go into the targets. You need the broom guys to swish right.”

“A broom guy not swishing right is sometimes a cause of the thingies going in the wrong spot on the circles,” agreed 17-year veteran referee Mel Grommet. “I see that all the time when I am refereeing curling games.”

Olympic Committee Considering Penalties

The US Olympic Committee member in charge of curling said the organization was looking into the incident, and would assess a penalty if they felt it was warranted.

“We expect our curling teams to honor the Olympic creed, which is the same as we expect from all our athletes. And while it’s true that sliding those thingies all day can be exasperating, especially when the broom guys aren’t swishing right – still, you can’t make a big pile up of thingies like that just because you’re upset.”

“Unless, of course, that’s how you score points. In which case, job well done.”

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