House Adds Goodnight Moon To Tax Bill – Lulls Members To Sleep

House Adds Goodnight Moon To Tax Bill – Lulls Members To Sleep

  WASHINGTON DC – In a parliamentary move designed to lull members of congress into a stupor before voting, the House Ways and Means Committee this week inserted text from the beloved children’s book “Goodnight Moon” into the preamble of the President’s tax reform bill.   Seldom Used Tactic The “Goodnight Moon Maneuver” as it […]

Trump Learns Attorney General’s Name Is Not Jeff Secessionist

Trump Learns Attorney General’s Name Is Not Jeff Secessionist

WASHINGTON DC – The unhappy surprises continued unabated for the embattled 45th President this week when an aide close to him pointed out that the nation’s Attorney General is not named Jeff Secessionist, but is in fact, Jeff Sessions. Mr. Sessions, who was hand-picked by Mr. Trump to lead the justice department, said that he […]

Trump Admits Chief Strategist Bannon Must Be An Imbecile

Trump Admits Chief Strategist Bannon Must Be An Imbecile

  WASHINGTON – Disclosures by the White House Friday, which exposed the assets of as many as 180 senior officials to public scrutiny, forced the President of the United States to face a difficult reality early this morning: his Chief Strategist, Steven Bannon, was worth less than 50 million dollars. “I was very surprised to […]

New “Charter Prisons” Initiative Announced By Trump Administration

New “Charter Prisons” Initiative Announced By Trump Administration

LEAVENWORTH, KS – In an effort to expand the choices available to communities for imprisoning their citizens, the Trump administration today announced a new initiative to encourage entrepreneurs to come up with new ways of locking people up. The brainchild of Attorney General Sessions and Education Secretary De Vos, the new “Charter Prisons” will allow […]

White House Confirms Stephen Miller’s Middle Name Not Hussein

White House Confirms Stephen Miller’s Middle Name Not Hussein

WASHINGTON DC – Responding to a feverish outpouring of untrue internet rumors that have been sweeping thru social media, the White House today took the unusual step of confirming that White House Aide Stephen Miller’s middle name is definitely not Hussein. While completely unfounded, the “Stephen Hussein Miller” rumor has gathered steam on Reddit, Twitter, […]