Clarence Thomas Returns To Senate As White Man Named Brett

Clarence Thomas Returns To Senate As White Man Named Brett

  WASHINGTON DC – In an impromptu visit to the Judiciary Committee that recommended his confirmation 27 years ago, Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas stopped by the US Senate this week to reminisce with the legislative branch as a white guy with a side-part.   Crazy Times Although admittedly not as young as he used […]

President Trump Swears Unholy Vengeance Upon All Canadian Cows

President Trump Swears Unholy Vengeance Upon All Canadian Cows

  OTTAWA, CANADA – In a remarkable departure from presidential decorum, Donald Trump today unsettled the Washington establishment when he was overcome with a terrible fervor in the Lincoln bedroom, swearing to the heavens that he would visit all manner of evil upon the bovine population of the United State’s northernmost neighbor, or die in […]

President Revokes Security Clearance Of Macaulay Culkin

President Revokes Security Clearance Of Macaulay Culkin

  THE PENTAGON – Lashing out at what he saw as a threat to national security after being told of an unflattering comment about himself, President Donald Trump today revoked all security privileges for the Home Alone child star MacCauley Culkin, effective immediately. Although Mr. Culkin has no security privileges or access to government classified […]


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